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Mark & Danica
We have adopted a beautiful 2 year old girl. Her name is Meredith and she is a real treasure. The birth parents said they found us on parentprofiles.com and loved the openess of our profile. They are wonderful people who have given us a precious gift!! more ...
Dealing with Doubt
When an important decision needs to be made, doubt is a normal accompanying factor. It will be there in the forefront of your mind. You'll find that when you are trying to make a big decision, doubt will cloud your judgement. That doubt can cause you to second-guess every decision you make; it can become paralyzing. Some will experience a standstill in their decision-making progression. If you find yourself in a similar experience, there are ways to deal with doubt and use it to your advantage, making a better, stronger, and more reliable decision.
Pros and Cons: Start with a basic list. What are the benefits of your choice? What are the negative aspects of your choice? In order to make an informed decision, you should consider your choice from all angles. By doing so, you will feel that you've made the right decision for your situation. Make a list over and over until you feel confident in your decision. Only then can you move forward with peace of mind.
Verbalize the Doubt: If you let the doubt fester it can become overwhelming. Find someone you trust and talk about it. Talk to a trusted friend or family member. Express everything you're feeling and thinking. If you don't have someone to talk to you can find a support group or a counselor. They can help you talk out your concerns and lead you to find which choice is right for you. A professional counselor or therapist will help you delve deeper into why you're feeling hesitation and doubt. Once you know the root of your doubt you can better deal with it moving forward.
Take a Break: Sometimes the constant stress of making an important decision will put your nerves on edge. When this is the case, it is better to take a break and take some time to relax and ponder. Do something you enjoy: watch a movie, read a book, take a nap, go for a walk, or hang out with friends. Whatever it is, try to take your mind off of your situation for a little while. You may find that your decision and your doubts will become clearer when you clear your mind. Taking a little break can give you a fresh perspective and provide you with a clearer understanding of your situation and your feelings.
Remember that experiencing doubt is normal. It can even be considered healthy. This is one way to recognize that you understand that you have a big, life-altering decision to make. It shows that you don't take the decision to place your child lightly. Take your time in making your decision. No one should force you into choosing when you're not ready. It is a big decision, and that takes time and confidence.