Our birth mother originally contacted another couple from our agency through parentprofiles.com. She communicated with them, but they all ultimately decided that they were not the right family for her baby. They did put her in contact with our case worker and that is how she came to us. If not for parentprofiles.com, we never would have found one another. Thanks also to that wonderful family who wanted to help her more ...
While parenting is strenuous and stressful, it can also be filled with many joys. These joys help offset the negative experiences, making for a more pleasant home environment. Because every parenting experience is unique, the joys of parenting will differ for each parent. Not every parent will experience every possible joy of parenting, as they are numerous and unique. During your unplanned pregnancy, considering your option to parent is a big decision to make. And it isn't necessarily as easy as choosing or not choosing something. It requires research, patience, and a full understanding or yourself, your situation, and how that particular decision will affect your life and your child's life. When it comes to parenting, it's important to look at the positives and negatives, the triumphs and failures, the pain and the joy. The joy, however, is what makes it all worth it.
The most immediate joy of becoming a parent is watching your child grow and develop. Throughout the first few days and weeks, you'll see incredible development, awareness, and strength. That strength and awareness will continue to grow and increase each day. And seeing it firsthand is a special opportunity, an opportunity that will create many happy memories. Along with watching your child grow, another joyous part of parenting is to have someone completely dependent on you. This baby needs you to feed, bathe, clothe, and love. Having someone so innocent depend on you can provide you with a better self-awareness and awareness of others, feelings of increased responsibility, and a desire to give your child a good, worthwhile life experience. Being a parent is about taking care of a child, but it also involves learning more about yourself along the way.
The parent-child bond is a special one. Some parents find that it's instantaneous, either right when pregnancy is discovered or immediately following labor and delivery. However, it's important to remember that not everyone bonds with their babies right away. It takes time for others. So, if you're not feeling that bond, be patient with yourself. Just because that bond isn't there yet doesn't mean you don't love your child. It will come, and it will be a momentous experience when it does.
As your child ages, s/he will become more independent and have a distinct personality. Soon your child will want to pour the milk into the cereal bowl, brush his/her hair, and pick out daily outfits. While it can become aggravating because of time constraints and stubbornness, embrace it. This is how your child develops confidence, likes and dislikes, and a distinct personality; your child will soon become his/her own little person with many unique thoughts and opinions. This little personality will grow and develop as your child does. And soon, your child will be a toddler, then in school, and then teenagers and young adults. What you do today will affect your child in the future. Encourage your child's personality and opinions while they're young. You'll see how it can develop over the coming years. And what greater joy is there than that?
Perhaps one of the greatest joys of choosing to parent is to see your child have children and choose to parent, because one of the happiest experiences for many is becoming a grandparent. Throughout this journey, remember that some joys are immediate and others will occur many years or decades down the road. No matter when they come, the simple joys of being a parent make up for all the stress and frustrations that come along for the ride.