Matt & Julie
We feel that our quest for a child was accelerated by allowing God to use the Internet as a way of delivering our daughter into our lives. What could have easily been years of waiting, turned out to be only eight and one-half months of waiting from start to finish, due to the Internet allowing us to reach a larger audience of potential birthparents. We know that this is how long it took for the more ...
Sometimes hearing or reading stories from others who have been where you are now comforts and inspires. It also teaches and helps you more fully understand your many options for your unplanned pregnancy. It can help you see the pros and cons of each choice and how it could affect your and your child's lives. Because making an informed decision is essential, take some time to listen to the experiences of others who have been in a similar situation.
Children have a certain confidence when healthy and cared for. My responsibility as a parent will be to love my child unconditionally, guide them through both good times and challenges, and provide the tools to become healthy and independent adults.
One great place to hear real life stories is in a support group. You'll find a gathering of those who have experienced unplanned pregnancies. You'll hear about what they decided to do and how it has affected them-emotionally, mentally, and physically. It's also a place where you can share your own story. Actively participating in support groups can also strengthen and build upon your current support system. You can develop a bond with the men and women with whom you interact, support, and accept. And they will do the same for you.
Along with your support group participation and attendance, it can be helpful to read real life stories online. In this section you'll read stories from birth parents, women who have had abortions, and from those who have parented alone. In each category you'll find positives and negatives that accompany each decision. From there you can decide which option works best for your goals, needs, and expectations.
Your current situation may be overwhelming, painful, and confusing, but remember that it is a journey. You'll learn more about yourself along the way, and you will become stronger than before. When you get to this point, consider sharing your story with others. Just as you have gleaned from others, you have the ability to help others in difficult situations by sharing your emotional and physical journey--whether you've decided to abort, parent, or place.
Sharing your story is also a way to emotionally heal. To express externally what you're feeling internally can be a freeing experience, because you're essentially letting it go instead of letting it fester or suffocate inside of you. And by sharing your real life story, you can come to a better understanding of yourself and the major decisions you've made that have altered you and affected your life.
Even though life may be difficult, remember that where you've been and who you've become gives you strength and makes you unique. You should never feel embarrassed because of that. Your experiences and the decisions you've made have sculpted you into the person you are today, and that's something to be proud of.